Wishing for the Sunset
by Lily and Shadow
Summary: Edward is blinded in battle and relies on Roy. Um... I don't want to give away everything, but it's me, so you know it'll be sad. Sorry I suck at summaries. It's better than it sounds. AT, RoyxEd.
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: **I do not own FMA.

I'm hoping Roy and Ed aren't too OOC, but whatever. I have a little more than this written, but not enough for another whole section. This is all I've written the entire week T.T Stupid AP test... fumes silently as she plots the demise of the AP board Anyway, it's kind of like Memories. I tend to get stuck on certian themes, and somehow they usually center on death... I dunno. I have a harder time with fanfics than I do with my novels. (Which I've been neglecting for, like, two weeks now. dodges a punch from Avy, her narrator. Someone please remind me to find less violent characters...) _Anyway_... sorry about the rambling. I'm sleep-deprived. Please enjoy and comment!

* * *

The sky overhead was a brilliant orange, the scattered clouds tinged with a light pink. A slight breeze chased the benevolent cotton wisps across the firey sky. The evening was calm and peaceful. In the cool grass two alchemists lay on their backs, side by side, hands clasped, staring up at the sunset. 

"It's beautiful, ne?" the smaller of the two said softly.

His raven-haired companion nodded and sat up. He smiled as he watched the breeze ruffle the boy's long, blonde hair, the fire of sunset reflected in his brilliant golden eyes. Still smiling, the taller man leaned down to kiss the blonde boy next to him. Breaking the kiss, he let himself fall back onto the grass, pulling the boy close so that his head rested on his chest, his arms locked around the boy's waist. It was the most beautiful sunset they had ever seen and they were at peace in each other's arms.

* * *

"Edward!" Mustang roared over the sound of the explosion. 

Ed felt himself lifted off his feet and thrown violently against the wall behind him by the force of the blast. Blood dripped from the fingers of his right hand as he placed his left over the gaping wound where the shattered bone stuck through. Beside him Lieutenant Riza Hawkeye had not fared so well. She was eerily still, her head falling forward onto her chest like a rag doll. There was blood trickling down her chin from one corner of her mouth as her half-closed yellow eyes clouded over. Grimly Ed realized that she was dead. So it was with most of his and Mustang's squad. The bodies of their fallen comrades were strewn unceremoniously across the battlefield, a chilling testament to the horrors of war.

This was the first time Ed had been into battle and he had been frightened at first. But the fear had only lasted for a moment before his fighting instincts kicked in and he launched himself into the attack with astonishing ferocity. Something had risen in him at that moment – he wasn't quite sure what – and he had fought like a cornered tiger, snarling as he destroyed everything in his path. But that had been before the explosion. Now the tiger had abandoned him and he was again drowning in his fear.

Before Ed had a chance to process what was happening or alert anyone to Hawkeye's death there was another explosion. This one came from behind him, demolishing the stone wall against which he had been thrown. He was briefly aware of an excruciating pain in his left leg and a horrible pounding in his head and he suddenly realized that he was very cold. The last thing he saw before the darkness closed over him was Roy rushing to his side.


	2. Chapter 2

Thank you soooo much to everybody who comment on part one! I'm really grateful for the reviews. Here's part two. I hope Ed and Roy aren't too OOC. I know it's short, but I haven't had time to write much lately. My characters from my novel The Forgotten finally got sick of being ignored and kept me up till two thirty Thurday night and that's the most writing I've done in about a week and a half. It's just been crazy lately. I'm not sure if I'll be able to update very much in the next couple of weeks. I have 10 days of highschool left! Prom is next weekend, I hve my final band concert this week, I have a huge senior project in my English AP class to make up for the portfolios we're not doing, I have a big final project to do in physics, I have senior projects in both Japanese and Spanish, I have to take my calculus exam because I'm terrible at math, and the last day of school the seniors are leaving for New York for four days. Chaos. I'll update if I can, but I make no promises until all of that is over, so 16 days from now. I do have a little more, and if I finish that section I'll try to post it. Again, thanks! Please enjoy and review.

A/N: once again, I do not own FMA... but I wish I did.

* * *

When Ed woke he was lying in bed and it was dark. He was surprised by how dark it was; he couldn't see anything. He heard someone moving and immediately tensed. 

"Edward, you're finally awake."

It was Roy's voice speaking from the darkness beside his bed. Ed relaxed a little, knowing he was safe.

"Where am I?" Ed asked.

"We're in the infirmary at the base," Roy replied gently, so much so that it made Ed slightly suspicious. To add to Ed's anxiety Roy added, "You were injured in the raid. There was an explosion and –"

Roy never got to finish his explanation. He was cut of by Ed's shocked scream. He had tried to raise his right arm to reach out to Roy, only to find that he couldn't feel it. When he had reached over with his left hand to touch his right arm, all he felt was a bandaged stump at his shoulder. His entire right arm was gone. He screamed in panic as he tried to move the arm he knew was no longer there. And then someone was holding him, stroking his hair and whispering in his ear.

"Shh. You're alright, Ed," Roy's voice said from the darkness as Ed was pressed close to the uniformed man's body. He knew it was Roy, he could tell by the smell of the jacket; a mix of cologne, coffee, morning glory, and faint sulfur that could only be the Flame Alchemist. Even so Ed struggled to free himself. This only caused Roy to tighten his grip. He was afraid that Ed might panic and hurt himself further.

"What's going on, Roy?" the small blonde shouted, unable to mask the fear in his voice. "What happened to my arm? Why is it so dark? Roy, help me."

That was it. Edward Elric, the proud Full Metal Alchemist, had been reduced to tears of fear and pain, to begging, pleading to be saved. Roy was shocked into silence. He just sat holding the boy for a moment before beginning his explanation again.

"You were injured in the raid," Roy said softly. "There was an explosion and a wall collapsed on top of you. You're lucky to be alive. You didn't get away without some pretty serious injures, though. Your right arm and your left leg were too badly damaged to be saved. I'm so sorry Edward."

He held the boy just far enough from him to get a good look at his face. Something wasn't right. His long blonde hair was loose, plastered to his abnormally pale face with a mixture of sweat and blood. He was shaking and tense, but that was to be expected of anyone who had been through as much as he had. But that wasn't what bothered Roy. It was the boy's eyes. Ed's usually bright golden eyes seemed dull and lifeless as they flickered around the room, never stopping to focus on anything, not even Roy. Then it hit him. _Why is it so dark?_ He couldn't see.

"Edward," Roy began hesitantly. "How many fingers am I holding up?"

"How am I supposed to know," Ed muttered irritably. "It's pitch black in here."

"You can't see anything?" Roy asked tentatively. He had to be sure.

Ed seemed annoyed by the question. "No. I already told you –"

"My god," Mustang breathed.

"What? What!"

"Edward," Mustang started gently, calmly. He put one rough hand on Ed's cheek. "It's not dark. I think you've lost your vision."

Ed stopped struggling. "No I haven't," he said stubbornly, even though he knew Roy was right.

Roy pulled the boy close to him and Ed buried his faced in the raven-haired man's jacket, twisting his remaining hand into the fabric. Roy held back the fear he felt for Ed as the small blonde sobbed into his chest. He couldn't stand seeing Edward in so much pain. And the worst part was knowing there was nothing he could do to make it stop. So he did the only thing he could do; he simply held the boy as he cried, vowing to stay by his side always.


	3. Chapter 3

Yeah, so I said I wouldn't be updating for a while. This is me neglecting my physics project... and my english project. I hate school! Anyway, This section's a little slow, but it was necessary. Please excuse the crappy ending. I was just trying to get it finished so I could post it. Also, if I hadn't gone ahead and ended it, it would have gone on forever. Please enjoy and review anyway. Thanks!

Thank you again to everyone who reviewed! And to answer a question I recieved, the little blurb with Roy and Ed watching the sunset at the begining of part one is before the war. There's a jump between that and the scene with the explosion. The little blurb's improtance will become clear at the end of the story.

A/N: nope, still don't own FMA.

* * *

The next few months were the most difficult of either of their lives. Ed and Mustang were all that remained of their squad, so they were sent home shortly after Ed had recovered enough to be moved. Neither of the two had been able to face the idea of returning to Central, so instead the set out for Ed's hometown of Resembool. Ed knew a family of automail mechanics there, and the quiet town would give them a chance to recover in peace before returning to headquarters.

At first Ed wondered just how they were going to get from the station to the home of his mechanic friend. It wasn't as though they'd had much to bring with them, everything they had had fit in Roy's pack, but it wasn't like Ed could walk, either. When the train stopped, Roy slung the pack over his shoulders and wrapped Ed's coat around him before he lifted the small blonde from his seat, cradling him like a small child. _Surely,_ Ed thought, _he doesn't intend to carry me all the way to Winry's._ But that was in fact his intention. Ed turned his blind eyes up toward Roy's face, awed by the man. He hadn't realized Roy was so strong.

After they had walked for a while, Ed felt Roy come to a stop. He assumed they had reached the Rockbell's and he felt himself shifted as Roy freed a hand to knock on the door.

The door swung open to reveal a tall, sandy-haired boy. His golden eyes were identical to Edward's. He stood staring open-mouthed at the stone-faced Colonel for a moment before he spoke.

"Colonel Mustang?" he gaped. Then he spotted the injured boy shivering in the Colonel's arms. "Brother?"

Ed shifted in Roy's arms, turning toward his brother's voice, "Alphonse?"

"Brother!" Al cried. He looked his brother over, trying to evaluate his injuries and noticed that his brother wasn't looking at him. "Brother? What's wrong?"

"Can we come in, Al?" Mustang said calmly.

"O-of course," Al stuttered, moving out of the door. He was slightly intimidated by the presence of the Flame Alchemist.

Roy carried Ed inside and laid him on the couch. He spread the boy's jacket over him and turned to Al.

"Hey Al, who's here?"

Ed recognized Winry's voice even though he couldn't see her. He tried to sit up, but Roy pushed him back down, telling him to lie still. He could hear her footsteps as she came down the stairs.

"Brother and Colonel Mustang," Al replied to her question.

"Ed and the Colonel?" Winry confirmed. She had been expecting Ed eventually, but not the Colonel. She bound into the room ready to tackle Ed and just as ready to ignore the cold military man, but she froze at the door.

Edward lay on the couch, his long, red coat spread over him. Something wasn't right about the way he lay. She also noticed that his dull, golden eyes wandered aimlessly around the room. Next to the couch the Colonel stood with arms crossed over his slightly battered chest. His expression was grim, his black eyes troubled. Winry wondered why the Colonel had come, but decided again to ignore him. She began to run to Ed, but the taller man stopped her.

"Hey-!" she started. Then she caught the look in the man's onyx eyes and fell silent.

"I know you're excited to see him," the raven-haired military man whispered gently to her. "Believe me, I understand. But be gentle. He isn't well."

Winry nodded and tiptoed to where Ed lay. Gently she took his hand as she knelt beside him. Behind her Al looked up at the Colonel with worried eyes.

"Colonel Mustang, sir, what happened to my brother?"

Mustang stared at him contemplatively for a moment. How far away the war seemed now as he stood in this bright, clean room. The smell of baking bread wafted in from the kitchen, something Mustang had not smelled since he had lost his parents. The warmth of the people here. He couldn't fathom that. He'd grown up in the city and this tiny town was strange to him. Then again, maybe it wasn't so strange. He had seen it all before, in the eyes of his lover. Yes, he could understand now all the things about Edward that had so puzzled him. Edward had not grown up on the mean streets of an uncaring city. Edward had not fought to stay alive. Edward had not scratched and clawed his way up from the depths of that void of hopelessness and despair. That was why Edward had a certain amount of restraint which he lacked where killing was concerned. It explained so many things about the boy….

With a sigh Mustang turned his attention back to the sandy-haired boy in front of him. "He was injured in a raid. He and I are all that's left of our squad. There was an explosion. He survived, but he lost his right arm and left leg."

"Is that why you brought him to me?" Winry asked, staring at the Colonel.

Mustang turned to the girl. She was staring at him, still holding Edward's hand.

"I'm an automail mechanic," she explained, noting his confusion. "I don't think we've been properly introduced. My name is Winry Rockbell."

"Colonel Roy Mustang," Mustang said. "And there's one more thing you should know regarding Edward." He could feel two sets of anxious eyes on him as he looked at the small boy he loved so much. "He's lost his vision."


	4. Chapter 4

Yay! Next chapter. I kinda rushed and so it's not that great, but whatever. Thanks again to everyone who has commented!

Disclaimer: No, I don't own FMA.

* * *

For the next few days Ed's condition improved steadily, but his vision still did not return. It was only when he was finally able to get up and, with Al or Mustang's help, get around the house that he asked Winry and her grandmother about the surgery that had been his reason for coming. At first they were reluctant because Ed was still so frail, but after quite a bit of urging from both Ed and Mustang, Winry and the woman Al called Aunt Pinako agreed to perform the automail surgery that would replace the alchemist's lost limbs. Ed was overjoyed at the decision, but Roy was a bit apprehensive. He knew this was what his lover so desperately wanted, but he too had been warned of the risks, which he knew Ed hadn't considered. Ed had always been a bit blind, for lack of a better word, when it came to things like this.

Tensely Roy paced outside the room where the surgery was going on. Winry and Pinako had assured him it would be alright and for a time Al had waited with him, but now he was alone and more nervous than ever. A thousand horrible thoughts ran through his head. What if something went wrong? Then something even worse came to him. What if he lost Edward?

His frantic thoughts were interrupted by a small voice next to him. "Colonel, are you alright?"

He looked down to see Al standing next to him holding a plate of onigiri. Silently he nodded at the boy, not wanting to voice his thoughts for fear of making them seem more real.

"I brought some food for both of us," Al offered. "It's been quite a while since they started and I noticed you didn't eat breakfast this morning. Are you sure you're alright?"

Again Mustang nodded. "Thank you, Al," he said as he took one of the onigiri.

Al sat, leaning against the wall, and watched the Colonel stare at the rice ball in his hand. There was something more to this. He had begun to realize from the first day that there was something odd about the way the Colonel acted around his brother.

"Colonel?" Al said, gesturing for Mustang to sit beside him. "May I ask you something?"

"Sure," Mustang responded dazedly.

"My brother…" Al began, not really sure of how to word his question. "Colonel, is there something between you and my brother?"

Mustang stared at the boy, his usually passive face a mask of shock. He quickly regained his composure. "He's my subordinate. It's my duty to watch over him. And besides, he's the only other person left from our squad. Both of us need support right now, after watching our comrades die, losing so many who were so close to up. You've never experienced the horrors of war. You don't know what it's like."

"I realized that," Al said cautiously. He didn't want to upset the Colonel, but he did want to know what was going on. "But that's not what I meant. My brother… are the two of you… You love him, don't you?"

Mustang nearly choked on the rice he had finally begun to eat. "What?"

"Are you in love with my brother?" Al asked again just as cautiously.

"Of course not," Mustang sputtered. "The Fullmetal is not only my subordinate, but he's fourteen years younger than I am. And he's a man. Do you know what you just suggested?"

Al shrugged. He decided that he may as well just say it. "That you are gay and that you and my brother are together. I understand why you would worry. You're in the military. You'd lose your job if anyone found out. But don't worry. I won't say anything."

Mustang was quiet for a moment. The boy had just called him gay, made it clear that he could destroy his career if he so chose, and then told him not to worry. Then again, this was his lover's younger brother. Maybe he should trust the boy.

Mustang took a deep breath and closed his eyes before he spoke. "You are correct." He looked over at the sandy haired boy to find that he was grinning at him. "I just told you that I'm…" he trailed off uncomfortably. "That doesn't bother you?"

The young alchemist shook his head. "Nope. I've known about Brother for years. He doesn't know that I know, of course, but when you know him as well as I do, it's pretty easy to figure it out. Plus I noticed the way you acted around him and the way he talked about you. Seeing the two of you during your time here just confirmed it for me."

Mustang didn't know what to say. It was the first time he had said anything to anyone on that topic. In Central he had dated as many girls as possible so that people wouldn't realize he preferred men yet this boy had just seen through everything. He told himself to calm down, that everything would be alright.

"Actually, I'm kind of happy about it," Al offered, breaking the awkward silence. "You really seem to care a lot about Brother and he seems so happy when you're around. That's all I'm concerned about. I just want Brother to be safe and happy, and I know with you he will be."

Mustang glanced over and saw that the boy was watching him. He smiled faintly. "Thank you, Alphonse." Maybe everything would be alright after all.

* * *

Just a note: This is not the end, even if it sounds like it. I promise there's more. ... that would be a really lame ending ... 


	5. Chapter 5

Hi, I'm back from New York. And I'm sick. I wrote these three sections over the past three days after I got back on Monday and while I was dealing with the worst of my illness. Therefore, they aren't that great. They're a bit rushed. I'll probably rewrite them at some point, but for right now it's good enough. I just wanted to get something up. I've had presentations at both my school and my sister's school for Japanese about going to Okinawa last summer as an exchange student, but the one Tuesday at my school went so badly, because of my being sick and lacking a voice, that sensei asked me to come back Friday and try it again. There was also the minor detail of the computer not working which inhibited my slide-show, but that's nearly irrelevent, although it did get me the second chance at presenting. So chaos pretty much sums up the last few days and I think it's begun to affect my writing. It'll be better when I can see straight, I promise.

Again, thank you to everyone who's commented. Thanks to Pink-Haro01, flower miko, VadMustang, Angibugg, Tsukasaru, essence of light, Everbloom-Kestrel, September's Nobara, Dark Chocolate Alchemist, Homestar Runner Peasants-Quest, AkitaFallow, and Lunadia-aloneforevermore for the encouragement and criticism.

A/N: I only wish I owned FMA.

* * *

It was dark, silent, peaceful. Roy sat at Ed's bedside gently stroking the boy's blonde hair as he slept. He was still unconscious after the automail surgery and it made Roy a bit nervous. In the moonlight the Colonel watched anxiously for any sign of movement from the small alchemist. Just as he began to doze off, Ed's golden eyes fluttered open. 

"Roy?" Ed croaked.

Roy started slightly. Ed was calling him. _Ed was calling him. _Ed was awake. "Edward!" Roy yelped, wrapping his arms around the frail boy.

"Roy, you're hurting me," Ed grunted. Roy let go immediately, apologizing profusely and taking Ed's hand instead. The small blonde laughed painfully. "What happened for me to get that kind of greeting?"

"You've been unconscious since the automail surgery two days ago," Roy explained.

"Two days ago? And you've stayed here since then?" Ed didn't really seem all that surprised.

Roy nodded. Then he remembered that Ed couldn't see him and voiced his answer with slight embarrassment. Ed smiled and squeezed his hand. Roy leaned over the boy, meaning to kiss him, but stopped. He knew that Ed couldn't see him and that he was still weak. It wasn't fair to the younger boy to surprise him like that right now.

"It's alright," Ed said, startling the Colonel yet again. "I don't mind."

"Ed?" Roy whispered.

"I don't know how I can tell what you're doing. I just can," Ed answered before Roy could even ask.

Roy found Ed's new ability somewhat unnerving, but at the moment it didn't matter. All that mattered was that Ed was alright. That they were alright. With that thought Roy leaned down and kissed the small blonde gently.

* * *

Three months had passed since the surgery to replace Ed's lost limbs, four since the battle which had taken them along with his sight. It was summer now. The sun shown brightly as Ed, Roy, and Al lay on the grass in the front yard. Winry was throwing a stick for Den, and Pinako had run everyone out of the kitchen until she finished cooking. Roy and Al were cloud watching, but it had become a competition to see who could find the most cloud-shapes in the least amount of time. Ed just lay there between his brother and his lover listening to their bickering, Winry's laughter, and

Den's barking. He was happy here. It was peaceful. In this familiar place, lying in the cool grass surrounded by these happy sounds, the horrors of war seemed a million miles away. Here with the ones he loved where the sun shone warm on his face and the sweet scent of summer hung thick in the air nothing could touch him. For the first time in a long time he was safe.

But he knew it couldn't last. His and Mustang's return to Central was inevitable, but that didn't mean they wanted to go. Roy had mentioned it to him the night before. He had laughed, joking that Hawkeye would kill him for getting so behind in his paperwork, but the laughter died quickly as he remembered that he wouldn't be seeing his lieutenant again. He would never see any of his squad again, save for Edward. Both of them had simply sat in silence, neither wanting to pursue the matter further. Quietly Ed resigned himself to the inevitable and decided to simply enjoy his remaining time at home.

That evening the same subject was brought up again at supper.

"So I suppose you'll be returning to that big base of yours soon, eh Colonel," Pinako comment over supper with all her usual tact. "And I you'll be taking our Ed with you I assume? Although, I don't really see the point in him going. He won't make a very good attack dog for the military without his sight."

"Aunt Pinako," Al protested, turning red. He knew the most likely reason for Mustang to be taking his brother back to Central with him and it had nothing to do with the military, but true to his word Al said nothing. "Can't you see he doesn't want to go either? You're making it worse for both of them."

Roy managed a faint smile. The boy had kept his promise. "Thanks, Al. Truth be told I would rather stay here. I'm not sure if I'm ready to face my empty squad block yet."

"You mean they're really all gone?" Winry asked softly.

Roy nodded. He was dreading going back. The silence would be unbearable, not having Hawkeye yelling, Fury and Havoc arguing; he thought briefly about bringing Black Hayate to the office with him, just to make things seem slightly more normal. He wasn't sure if he could stand being there alone, but having Ed there with him would surely help. As painful at it would be for both of them, at least they were in this together.

For now, though, Roy was happy just to be here. To feel like part of a family. He knew that there were several people missing. Winry's parents, Pinako's daughter and son-in-law, had been killed in the Ishvalan War. Ed and Al's parents were also missing. Their mother, he knew, had died when they were young and their father had simply vanished. Headquarters had never quite given up looking for the missing state alchemist. But in spite of all of that, all the losses, they still seemed so cheerful. He wondered distractedly if he and Ed would be able to recover from the loss of their military family as well as this make-shift family had recovered. With a sigh he pulled himself back into reality, focusing on dispelling the concerned looks of those around him.

* * *

The day of Ed and Roy's departure had arrived. It was the day they had both dreaded for so long. Ed had finally mastered the use of his automail and learned to work with Roy to make up for his lost vision. Today they would return to their now vacant section of headquarters. 

The two alchemists stood side by side in the doorway of the house, one of Roy's hands resting on Ed's shoulder to help guide him. One by one Winry, Pinako, and Al embraced Ed and shook Roy's free hand. The raven-haired man was the picture of misery as he stood stone-faced in the doorway, his pack, containing all the possessions with which he and his subordinate had arrived five months earlier, slung over his shoulder. His blind comrade stood at his side, blank face and dead eyes betraying no emotion as they said their goodbyes. If Al hadn't known better he would have thought they were going to their execution.

"Be careful," Pinako warned. "Take care of yourselves. Make sure you're eating well. If you don't you won't recover well."

To this Winry added, "And don't break your automail, Ed."

Ed and Roy nodded. Al stepped forward to embrace his brother again.

"Be safe," he whispered to him so that the others couldn't hear. "Trust Mustang. He really cares about you a lot. Good luck."

He released his brother and turned to embrace Mustang, leaning close to speak in his ear. "Good luck. Take good care of Brother for me."

Roy nodded dumbly as the boy stepped back. Together the three members of the make-shift family waved and shouted their farewells as the two alchemists started off down the road.


	6. Chapter 6

Ok, I finally got a jump drive. Yay jump drive! That means I can update. Sorry about the wait. Also this section's kinda weird. I wrote most of it at 3 in the morning. Not all in the same night either. There were multiple occurances of that. What can I say, I'm a bit of an insomniac. I don't know when the next section will be up cause I'm having surgery on Thursday. Stupid crutches. I already have most of it written, but that means nothing. I've also found that my light sensitivity has been getting worse, which reduces the amount of time I can spend working on the computer. So, in light of the fact that god hates me, I have no idea when or how often this will be updated. Sorry about that. I AM CONTINUING THE STORY. I haven't dropped it, so if I don't think I did just cause an eternity passes without an update.

Thank you to Lunadia for your comment, even on the author's note. Tis wonderful encouragement.

And of course, I don't own FMA. If I did the ending wouldn't have sucked quite so much.

* * *

"Roy, where are we?" Ed asked for the umpteenth time.

Beside him the raven-haired man sighed wearily. They were on a train back to Central and had been for the past three hours. "We're passing through the mountains," he said patiently. "It's almost sunset. You should see it. It looks like the whole sky is burning."

The blind blonde buried his face against the Flame Alchemist's arm. He remembered a time not too long ago when he _could_ have seen what Roy was talking about. He remembered lying in the grass with the dark-eyed man, just watching the sun set and enjoying each other's company. He remembered distinctly the colors of the sky that night; the rosy pinks, fiery oranges, and bright blood reds of each cloud as the dying sun descended beyond the edge of the earth. The colors remained all the more brilliant in his mind to make up for his lost sight.

He turned his deadened eyes on his companion. "I remember the sunset," he whispered softly. He felt Roy's arms close around him, pulling him close.

Roy smiled as he remembered the night so long ago when he and Edward had snuck away from headquarters to watch the sun set. He had told Hawkeye that he was going for a walk, leaving before she could question him. Immediately he had gone to find Edward and had taken him on a walk in the park. It was the most beautiful sunset either of them had ever seen. But that had been nearly a year ago. That night had been one of the last they had spent together before being sent off to war. Silently he held the small alchemist tighter, resting his chin on top of the boy's blonde head.

"What's wrong Roy?" Ed asked softly, sensing the man's distress.

"Nothing," Roy sighed. "Just memories. That's all."

Ed shifted a little in his arms. "Hey Roy?"

"Yes?"

"Do you remember that time when –"

"– I snuck out of HQ and –"

"– came to find me to –"

"– take you on a walk in the park so we –"

"– could watch the sunset together?"

"Yeah."

"Hey Roy?"

"Yeah?"

"I love you," Ed whispered softly, wrapping his arms around the darker man.

"I love you too, Ed," Roy replied. He ran a hand over the boy's long blonde hair and down his back as his onyx eyes shifted to the scene outside the window. He sighed again as his mind carried him back to happier times when the red of the clouds hadn't reminded him of the blood of his fallen comrades. He felt Ed shift again, pressing himself closer. There was a gentle hand on his cheek and he felt Edward's lips pressed against his own. Slowly he felt the golden-eyed boy pull away, choosing instead to rest his head against Roy's chest.

"Something's bothering you Roy," the small blonde said quietly. "No matter what it is, you know you can tell me. You do trust me, don't you?"

Again Roy sighed. Mentally he noted how often he had taken to sighing of late. In a steady, even voice he answered, "Yes." The fine lines around his drawn mouth and his charcoal-colored eyes betrayed the years of worry he had tried so hard to hide. "You're lucky, Ed."

"How so?" Ed questioned. He was alive and he still had Roy, but beyond that he didn't really see how he was lucky.

"You have a home and a family," Roy said simply, catching the blonde off guard.

"What about you?" It occurred to Ed that he had never heard Roy so much as mention his family. He never spoke about his past. In fact, Ed didn't even know when Roy's birthday was.

The older alchemist shook his head. "They're long gone."

Ed cocked his head in a silent question. He did not need to speak. Roy could read him well enough that he knew what Ed would ask.

"It was when I was very young; much younger than you and your brother when your mother died." He paused to watch as a shadow of pain passed over the young blonde's expressive countenance. "I lived in a large city in the south. The place where I lived wasn't the best part of town. Far from it. Seeing where you and Al grew up amazed me, really, because it was so different. When my parents were alive they never even allowed me to leave our apartment unless one of them was with me. There was quite a bit of violent crime in that area. It worried my mother.

"We did alright. Not great by any stretch of the imagination, but alright. My father was often ill, so he only held odd jobs. But he did all he could to support us and what he couldn't do, my mother made up for with her sewing. It wasn't easy, but we were happy. At least, for a little while.

"On the night of my seventh birthday my parents took me to the park. It was an undeniably simple act, one you probably find meaningless, but to me… They never had time to take me anywhere. I didn't really mind. Usually I would stay at home with my mother, helping her with household chores, anything I could think of to keep myself busy. I had begun teaching myself alchemy to ward off boredom. I had heard my mother talk about it and decided to learn. Some of the people my father would work for were alchemists, and he asked them for suggestions to help me in my venture. The majority agreed, some even sending me drawings of different simple arrays and notes on how to use them. But I'm getting away from my story.

"As I said, on my seventh birthday they took me to the park. By the time we left it was already dark. My mother had been asking my father to leave for an hour, but he had insisted on staying, pointing out to her how happy I was to finally be a 'normal child.' As I said, the amount of violence in the area near our home worried my mother. My father wasn't as bothered by it, and being a child it didn't even faze me. But my mother… She had grown up far from the city so, unlike my father, she was unaccustomed to such things. When we started home it was dark. My mother was worried because it was so late. She clung to my father's arm as he carried me, shushing her all the while. My father was a kind man. He loved my mother dearly and hated to see her so upset. He told her everything would be alright. He was wrong.

"We were attacked by thieves four blocks from home." He stopped. Ed could feel his pain. He had gotten so good at reading Roy's emotions, even without sight, that he could literally feel it. The way he hunched his shoulders, the way his head had fallen so that his chin rested just above Ed's ear, the way his limbs seemed to grow heavier as he tightened his grip on the small blonde. Ed could feel Roy's breath growing uneven, hear the slight crack in his voice and feel the shudder of a faint cough as he tried to clear it away.

"I'm sorry," Ed whispered. He knew it didn't even come close to helping, but it was all he could think of to say. Much to his surprise, he felt Roy lift his head and clear his throat to continue speaking.

"After that," he said quietly, "I left the city. I've never been back. I just wandered for a while. No one ever took notice of me. I was just another kid out on the streets. What did they care? But as I wandered I did everything I could to learn more alchemy. My father had once spoken of a man he knew who was a state alchemist. I decided that was what I wanted to do.

"Long story short, I spent a few odd years working whatever small jobs I could get while I studied for the state alchemy exam. On my third try, I passed. You know the rest." Roy drew his story to a close with sigh so faint it was scarcely audible.

Ed was silent, not really knowing what to say. At least now he knew why Roy never talked about his past. It was obviously painful for him and there was also the matter of his pride to consider. He could only imagine what some of the others might have said had they known. Again it was Roy who broke the silence.

"You should get some sleep," Roy said almost too softly to hear. Ed noted the mixture of exhaustion and sadness in his voice. "We'll be there soon. God knows this won't be easy."

Ed felt himself pulled onto Roy's lap. Part of him wanted to protest, but he resisted the urge in the hope that perhaps he could be of some comfort. He felt a hand on the back of his neck and the other on his shoulder, pulling him against the distressed colonel. The way Roy had held him when he was injured, the way Roy had held him when he thought he was asleep, the way Roy had held him when he first realized he was blind. The thought made Ed shudder. Again he resisted the urge to wriggle out of his lover's arms. Why like this? Ed didn't question, just closed his eyes and pretended to sleep. He thought perhaps it was for the best.

As Ed rested he heard Roy muttering to himself under his breath. It was rather disconcerting, but Ed willed himself to listen rather than try to ignore it.

"Maes, I wish you were here right now," Roy murmured, unaware that Ed was listening. "I don't know what to do. Going back to HQ tomorrow's going to kill me. It'll just be too much. And I don't have you here to save my sorry ass this time. I have Ed with me, thank god, but still. It's going to be painful. For both of us. You always knew what to say, no matter what was going on. First you, now Riza. Edward is all I have left."

Ed had heard enough. "Roy."

Roy started. "Ed. I didn't know you were awake."

"What was that about Maes and Riza?" Ed questioned, not really knowing why. Maes had been Roy's best friend for as long as he had known them and Riza was the one member of their squad Roy had trusted more than anyone, save for Ed of course. Ed knew that, but for some reason hearing Roy talk about them when he wouldn't confide in him upset Ed.

"You weren't really supposed to hear that," Roy said. He didn't sound embarrassed as Ed had expected, merely tired. His tone made Ed rethink his half-formed accusations. "Just a little tired, a little anxious almost. I don't really know what to do. That was Maes's strong point. It seemed like he always knew exactly what to do in any situation, no matter how strange or awkward or down-right brutal it was. You know, he's the one who convinced me to talk to you in the first place. You do know that, right? Judging by your expression, that's a no. He pushed me into it, actually. He got Riza involved, used her as a threat. Talk to him or Riza shoots you. It's funny now, but I actually believed she would shoot me. Then again…"

Ed and Roy both laughed at the memory of their trigger-happy colleague. Ed just managed to say between giggles, "You know, she was probably glad for an excuse to threaten you. She'd shoot just about anybody. She probably kept her gun under her pillow at night so just she'd have it close by."

"She did," Roy replied quietly, suddenly becoming solemn again.

Ed followed suit, every trace of merriment leaving his voice as he said, "I'm not sure whether to ask why or why you know that."

"She did it because of some things that had happened in her past. And I know because of the times I spent the night at her place," Roy confessed. He caught the look Ed was giving him and added, "I didn't do anything with her. It used to be on exceptionally bad days Maes would make me stay the night with him because he didn't trust me on my own. Thought I might do something rash." Ed's mind replayed Roy's earlier comment, _I don't have you here to save my sorry ass this time._ "After he got married it made Gracia uncomfortable to have me roaming the house at night. You know how I am when I'm in one of my moods. I know I've kept you up before with my pacing. Anyway, Gracia was too kind to say anything, but Maes knew it bothered her. That's where Riza came in. She was living alone, so there wouldn't be anyone else there for me to upset, and she was single, so there wasn't even the problem of the jealous boyfriend to contend with. She and Maes agreed that I would stay with her whenever Maes deemed it unsafe for me to be home alone."

"Something rash?" Ed questioned.

"Maes once stopped me from… well…." Roy sighed. Ed knew better than to press the matter.

"Maybe _you_ should get some sleep," Ed said gently. Roy just shook his head and told Ed not to worry, that he should rest before they arrived in Central. Ed caved, settling himself in Roy's arms, and slowly fell into a troubled sleep.


	7. Chapter 7

Ok, so. Part seven. This is kinda short, but oh well. I don't know why I felt like I still had to get everything done before my sugery. My dad and I set up the wireless router today, so I can now post from my laptop so long as I'm in the house. As for the surgery, it's a hip athroscopy. Basicly they're just trying to find out what's wrong with it and they might have to clean out the joint. Nothing too major. Thank you for your concern and well wishes. It means a lot to me.

Also, thank you to all of my loyal reviewers. Lunadia, msberry, Spirix, KobrahEdo, AkitaFallow, and Dark Chocolate Alchemist. Thanks again to everyone who has reviewed on this story. Honestly I love reading what you guys have to say. It never fails to make me smile. You guy keep me writing. Thanks again.

And now the now so fun part: the disclaimer. I do not, and probably never will, own FMA.

* * *

When the train pulled in to Central Ed started, jolted out of his troubled sleep by the sudden stop. Roy smiled grimly at the small blonde before remembering that he couldn't see his expression. "We're here, Ed," he said instead. The boy looked up at him with sleepy, sightless eyes. "Ready?" he asked softly.

"Ready as I'll ever be," Ed sighed in response. "Let's get this over with."

Together the two men stepped onto the platform. Roy sighed and Ed tightened his grip on his coat. Neither felt inclined to talk. They were both apprehensive about returning to the emptiness of headquarters. The silence they were sure to encounter there would only serve to solidify the knowledge that their friends and comrades were gone forever.

As Roy lead him through the city Ed sensed that something wasn't right. He knew the streets of Central like the back of his hand and even though he hadn't been there since he lost his vision he could tell they were going the wrong way.

"Roy?" he said, feeling the taller man turn to glance at him. "Where are we going?'

"Our house," Roy replied as thought this should be the most obvious thing in the world. Realization dawned on Ed's face. They were going home. Not to Ed's childhood home, but _home,_ to where they lived. They hadn't been there since before the war.

Carefully Roy guided his blind companion through the streets until they stood on their doorstep. Without a word he pulled a key from the pocket of his coat, leaving Ed to wonder if he had had it with him all this time. As soon as Ed heard the door open, creaking ever so slightly with disuse, he knew he was home. Yet there was something horribly wrong about the whole atmosphere of the place. It seemed dead, empty. Silently he moved closer to Roy as though for warmth.

Roy moved Ed in front of him, placing his hands on his shoulders to guide him through the house. He recited to Ed what room they were in as they came to it, even though Ed found this to be completely unnecessary. There was no way he could forget this place. The house was cold now and the air was stale, but he could remember the feel of each room. He remembered the smell of cooking from the small but inviting kitchen, the musty paper smell of the quaint little study where he had once spent so much of his time - he cringed at the thought that he could no longer read - and the odd coffee and gunpowder scent of the comfortable living room, the result of two insomniac military officers living under the same roof.

Finally Roy's little tour took them upstairs to their bedroom. Ed stopped in the doorway, a faint blush creeping across his pale face. Memories are a funny thing - sometimes they're more powerful than the event itself. Roy noted with surprise the soft pink staining Ed's cheeks. He couldn't think of why the boy would be so embarrassed about, it wasn't as though anything had changed between them. Lacking any better idea of what to do he wrapped his arms around Ed's waist and whispered to him, "It's alright,"

Ed shuddered slightly as his face turned a deeper shade of pink, but he allowed himself to be led inside. Roy sat him down on the edge of the bed and moved to the other side of the room. He opened the top drawer of the old wooden dresser in the corner. Sure enough everything was still there just a they had left it. He pulled out a t-shirt and a pair of shorts and sniffed them. They smelled slightly of mothballs and dust, but it was good enough. Crossing back to where Ed sat he handed him the clothes.

"There's no point in you staying in uniform," Roy said. "We're not going back to HQ tonight. After you change, would you come downstairs? There's something I'd like to talk to you about."

"If you don't mind," Ed said wearily, "I'm really tired. I'd rather just sleep. Can it wait until morning?"

He felt guilty about brushing Roy off like that, especially after all the man had done for him, but he was still a little uneasy. Something just felt wrong. On the far side of the room he heard a rustling of fabric as Roy changed out of his uniform. Contrary to the beliefs of most of the officers at headquarters Roy did not sleep in uniform. Ed decided that he should do the same and felt for the clothes Roy had given him. As he pulled the t-shirt over his blonde head he felt the bed shift with Roy's weight. He still felt a little self-conscious about letting his automail show, but he knew Roy didn't mind it.

Roy lie on his back, staring up through the darkness at the blank, white ceiling. It had never occurred to him before just how drab the house looked. Ed pulled on his shirt and laid down next to him. Roy felt a little better to finally lie beside his lover again; they had slept in separate rooms during the five months they had spent in Resmbool to avoid raising suspicion and of course they had been separated during the war. He moved a little closer and put his arms around the boy. Much to his surprise Ed tensed and seemed to recoil. He let him go and he seemed to relax.

"Ed?" Roy whispered. "Is everything alright?"

Ed nodded.

"You're acting strangely. Did I do something wrong?"

Ed shook his head.

"Did something happen?"

Again Ed shook his head.

"Why do you flinch when I touch you?"

"I just… I don't want… Roy…I'm sorry." Ed turned to face him. Dead as they seemed, his golden eyes had an imploring look about them, as though even now they were searching Roy for some hint as to his motives. "It's just, right now, I don't think I can… you know…"

Relief washed over Roy. "Is that all you were worried about? Ed. My god. Ed, I'm not going to push you to do anything. I would never do that to you."

Ed smiled sheepishly. Almost apologetically he moved over so that his head rested against the raven-haired man's shoulder, allowing Roy to hold him. He seemed reassured by what Roy had said. Soon the small blonde was asleep, leaving Roy alone with his thoughts. He couldn't imagine why Ed was suddenly so wary of him. It hurt him that the boy should be so suspicious. Silently he held the blonde alchemist tighter as though he might awaken at any moment and bolt from the room. It was hard enough to be back here, knowing things would never be the same. Now Ed was acting strangely. He had lost his best friend, his loyal companion, and now it seemed that he would lose Ed, albeit in a different sense. He could feel himself losing control. With a strangled sound he buried his face in the boy's blonde hair, determined to maintain control over his emotions. This was going to be harder than he could have possibly imagined.


	8. 8a

**A/N: **Hola! Yay, next section. Ok, explaination time. This is part of one section. Therefore, I am calling this section 8a. Reason behind this: I felt like it had taken me forever to get this far, and I wanted to post _something_. I have a little of 8b done, but that probably won't be all of 8 either. There will probably be at least to 8c. And the whole of 8 all together would probably be excrutiatingly long, cause it seems like it's going to go on forever. So that's why the shortness and weird ending. Sorry about that.

In other news, all went well with my surgery. So much so that I should only be on crutches for 4 weeks instead of 6. Also. my writting should make more sense now because i'm no longer on pain meds. (If you read the new story I started posting, you'll know what I mean. I might take that down and fix it.) Thanks to Luna for the well wishes.

A big thank you to everyone who commented: Lunadia, AkitaFallow, MARYLOVER, ShinigamixGirl, FMA lover 912, and Dark Chocolate Alchemist. I really do appriciate your encouragement and I love reading your comments.

And for ShinigamixGirl, I wouldn't say that Ed has emapthy. He's just really close to Roy, so he can pick up on subtleties and mannerisms that others might miss. Therefore, he's really good at guessing what Roy is thinking and feeling. He can do the same thing with Al because they're brothers.

* * *

Ed woke early the following morning. Silently he wriggled out of Roy's arms, careful not to wake him, and made his way across the room. He stopped at the window, enjoying the feeling of the early morning sunshine on his face. He had no way of knowing that the dark-haired man behind him had opened his eyes.

Roy lay perfectly still, watching the boy at the window. The sun caught his long, blonde hair which, free of it's usual braid, fell halfway down his back and made a faint, glowing halo around the small alchemist's head.

"Morning, Ed," he whispered, doing his best not to startle the young alchemist.

"Morning, Roy," the golden-haired boy replied. He seemed oddly distracted, which worried Roy. He didn't even turn to face the dark-eyed man behind him. Roy told himself it was because he was blind and it wouldn't matter as he couldn't see him anyway, but he knew it wasn't true. He had never been like this before. Ever since the war he had been even more attached to his older companion than before. Now, though, he seemed cold and aloof.

"What's wrong, Ed?" Roy asked cautiously. He didn't want to upset the boy further.

"It's nothing," Ed said in a tone that clearly stated otherwise. Still he kept his back to the older man.

"Are you ok going back to HQ this morning?" Roy asked softly.

"I suppose," came the shaky reply. "I mean, we have to do it some time."

Ed let out a soft sigh and dropped his head. _I wish I knew what was wrong with me_, he thought to himself. _Roy, I'm so sorry. I don't know what's come over me. Maybe it's just the strain of coming home after so long. Maybe I'm just self-conscious about the automail… Or maybe I'm finally losing my mind._

"I'm taking a shower," he said instead. In silence he trailed his flesh hand along the wall until he came to the dresser they shared. He took out a set of clean clothes, hoping he had one of his uniforms, and walked down the hall to the bathroom, still trailing his flesh hand along the wall.

The hot water felt wonderful as it cascaded down over his lithe frame. He ran his hands through his long, golden hair, letting the water soak all of it. Slowly he felt the tension leaving his muscles. _Nothing feels right anymore. It's like when I lost my vision, I lost myself._ In silence Ed finished his shower, doing his best to keep himself from thinking. He knew if this continued, he would drive himself over the edge into insanity.

"Fitting," he scoffed at himself, giving up on getting all of the water out of his metal joints. _Of course I'll end up a useless, broken shell of a man. I've known my fate for a long time now, I just haven't been willing to admit it._ He barely managed to repress a shudder at the memories. They had begun haunting him again after the botched raid; at first plaguing him only in his sleep, but now they haunted even when he was awake.

He sighed again. Roy had only thought he was asleep. He had heard him crying. It killed Ed to know what he was doing to the man he loved so much. But there was some long repressed part of him that wouldn't let him trust Roy. Something in the back of his mind screamed every time the man touched him. He wasn't sure how much more he could take.

Ed forced himself out of his thoughts only to find that he had forgotten his shirt.

"Great," he muttered under his breath.

* * *

**A/N: **As I said, very short. My appologies. I'll probably post 8b tomorrow or the day after. Thanks for reading!


	9. 8b

**A/N:** Hola! Yay! I finally got out of the rut I was stuck in. So here's the next section. Sorry for the delay.

A big thank you to everyone who reviewed: Spirix, Dark Chocolate Alchemist, Ling Yao, AkitaFallow, ShinigamixGirl, ShadowDragonMistress, and catwomen47.

* * *

Roy lay on his back, staring at the ceiling as he waited for Ed to come back. He heard the water turn off and Ed's mismatched footsteps in the hall. He had been searching his memories of the boy's time in the military for any clue as to what might be bothering him. Then again, maybe it was just that the strain from everything that had happened over the past year was finally getting to him. He sat up as the door opened and Ed entered the room.

He was taken aback by the sight of the boy. His long hair was down, making him appear slightly feminine, but he was shirtless. His entire upper body was covered in scars. The worst were around where his automail arm was attached, but his back was covered with scars from the shrapnel that had nearly killed him and his chest displayed the after affects of horrendous burns. His remaining arm was covered with scars from the same explosions. They concealed all of his pre-existing scars, save for one.

Roy could still see the long, curved scar that started at his shoulder and came down over Ed's heart. It was from one of his early missions. Roy could still remember when the medics brought him in. It was long ago, before he'd even confessed to Maes that he had feelings for Ed. _He shouldn't have lived. _Roy shuddered at the thought. _He should have died that night._

Ed had been in Leore. No, he had been on the way back from Leore. He and his brother had been kidnapped by homunculi. It was the last mission he had allowed Al to accompany him on. Roy still didn't know exactly what had happened. He knew what had happened to Al, but Ed wouldn't talk about it and they had been separated. As far as he knew even Al didn't know what had happened to his brother. All Ed had ever said was that it was Lust who had injured him. Something to do with her being angry at Envy, but he refused to say anymore.

It was amazing that he had even survived, let alone been able to return to his job. Then again, that was just the kind of person Ed was. If there was something he wanted to do, he would do it.

"Roy," Ed said softly, bringing him out of his reverie. "I know you're still in here."

Ed had an uncanny knack for that kind of thing. The dark-haired alchemist reflected that the younger blonde had probably heard his breathing, possibly even his heartbeat. Most likely it had something to do with his blindness, although he had shown some signs of the odd trait before the war as well.

"Yes?" Roy answered.

Ed took a shirt from the dresser and put it on before sitting next to Roy on edge of the bed. Roy was surprised that Ed knew not only that he was in the room, but exactly where he was. He had spent a short amount of time up pacing.

Ed looked over at Roy, his sightless golden eyes meeting the intense gaze of his lover's charcoal-coloured ones. Again Roy wondered how the blonde managed such things.

"You said last night that there was something you wanted to talk about?"

Roy remembered instantly what he was talking about. He had intended to tell Ed about his encounter with Al months before. His intention had been to inform Ed that his brother knew about their relationship. Somehow, though it didn't seem so important now.

"It's nothing," Roy said honestly. "We ought to make an effort to get to HQ this morning."

"Right," Ed sighed. Roy could hear him trudging down the stairs to the living room to wait for him. This was going to be a long day.

* * *

**A/N: **I know, it's short. Now that I've finished this section, I might have 8c up soon. I make no promises this time, cause if I do I'll probably write myself into a corner again. Thanks for reading! 


	10. 8c

**A/N:** Ok, next section. I'm not sure it's quite up to par, but it wasn't getting any better. I tried, honest. It's kind of corny too, but hey, I like writing sappy stuff. It's one of the few girly things I do. Ok, so, now that I've rambled at you, on to the story.

* * *

Both men were silent as they walked to headquarters, a little closer than usual. They were greeted warmly by a sympathetic secretary as they entered the building, both just acknowledging her with a nod before continuing on her way. The halls were clean and brightly lit as they made their way through the maze of a building, but to Roy it may as well have been a dank stone corridor which would end in a dungeon. To Ed, the darkness that enveloped him was oddly fitting. Never had he felt more gloomy.

When they finally reached their offices, Roy stopped, hesitating to open the door. Both alchemists knew that once the door was opened there was no going back. They would finally have to face the truth they had been avoiding for so long. Roy took a deep breath and opened the door.

The offices were exactly how he remembered them. They looked untouched, even if they were strangely dust-free. Ed clung to the back of his coat as Roy wandered through the room to his desk. It was clean for the first time since he had begun his military career. He had made sure to tidy up a bit before they left for the war. Everything was so perfectly the same that he half expected Hawkeye to walk in at any moment with an armful of paperwork and a threat of what would happen if he failed to finish it.

Ed, who had made his way over to his usual place on the couch, finally broke the eerie silence. "It's too quiet here."

Roy started. Although he had spoken in barely more than a whisper Ed's words seemed infinitely loud in the stillness of the room.

"I don't like being here," Ed continued in the quiet boom. "It has a feeling of death. I don't like it. Now that Hawkeye and Breda and Fuery and Havoc aren't here …." He let his statement trail off, feeling that it was unnecessary to finish it.

Roy made a small noise of agreement as he rose from the desk.

"Eventually we'll have to get this place working again, but first why don't we take a walk," he suggested.

Ed wanted to know where they were going, but Roy wouldn't tell him. He remembered the last time they had snuck out of headquarters to take a walk. He remembered the sunset. After a brief battle of wills Ed agreed despite not knowing where they were going. Silently he allowed Roy to lead him out of the building and through the streets of Central.

They stopped at a small café which they had frequented before the war and Roy ordered them lunch. While they waited Roy took out a pen and four sheets of paper and handed them to Ed, who gave him a questioning look.

"Write something to each of them," he instructed. "You'll see."

Ed gave him a puzzled look and took up the pen. Carefully he began to write the letters as he had been instructed. When he had finished he handed them back to Roy.

Roy took the notes from Ed, glancing over each them before adding a message of his own. He smiled at the fond memories Ed had recounted, but when he got to Hawkeye's, he stopped. Slowly he lowered the paper as he read with wide eyes.

Riza,

Hey. This is kind of odd, but I wanted to say thank you. Roy told me about you and Hughes. I can't tell you how grateful I am for what you did. Thank you for keeping him safe. I wish I could do something to show you how grateful I really am, but there isn't anything I can do now. So I'll take you place keeping him safe as best as I can. Thank you.

Edward Elric, the Full Metal Alchemist

Roy took a moment to stare at Ed. He was fidgeting nervously with his chopsticks, face turned toward the window. There was a distant look about his features, as though he was lost in a long ago memory. Roy knew how Ed felt about him, or at least he was fairly certain he did, but this was still a shock to him. Finally he took up the pen and added his own message of gratitude. When he finished he folded the four papers into cranes, hiding the words inside, and placed them in his pocket.

"Ed," he whispered. "Let's go."

The small blonde nodded and attached himself to Roy's jacket. Again the two were silent as they wondered through the streets. Ed savoured the feeling of a cool breeze on his face and the warmth of Roy's back against his curled hand. He felt childish being led around in such a manner, but he dismissed it as he heard the raven-haired man sigh. Suddenly Ed knew where they were going and moved a little closer to Roy.

* * *

**A/N: **First off, sorry about the cliff-hanger. Ok, the cranes. There is a reason I chose cranes. They're supposed to bring good luck and health. I know it seems weird since the messages on them are to their dead comrades. But think about it for a minute. These are their friends and they really don't want to let them go. 8d should be up soon. Thanks for reading!


	11. 8d

**A/N:** Hola! This is the final part of section 8. Sorry it took so long! It probably won't take me so long for the next section.

Thanks to Ling Yao, Lunadia, CuteLittleEarthbender, Dark Chocolate Alchemist, ed'sgirl10310, KobrahEdo, and Spirix for reviewing!

* * *

As they passed through the iron gate into the cemetery Roy made sure not to let Ed step on any of the grave sites. This was Central's military cemetery. Roy had brought them here to pay a final visit to their fallen friends.

"Roy," Ed whispered, "I want to see the headstones."

Roy nodded, knowing Ed would feel it because of the way he was clinging to his jacket. Gently he helped the boy to find the first headstone. Ed knelt, tracing the letters with the fingers of his left hand. It was Jean Havoc. Ed could read the man's name, rank, and the years he had lived with great ease, but it seemed that was all there was. He frowned; there should have been something more. There was more to Havoc than his name, rank, and the dates of his birth and death. Anyone who had known the man knew that. He felt tears of loss and frustration welling in his eyes as memories of the fallen soldier flashed in his mind. He could see his friend's big, goofy smile, the ever-present cigarette dangling precariously from his lip. He could see Breda smiling nervously next to him, one hand on the back of his neck as he tried to explain to a rather cross Hawkeye why he had hidden from Black Hayate. In the memory Hawkeye was holding the small black and white ball of fur while an irate Mustang glared at everyone for disturbing the peace of his office. Falman and Hughes were there too. Falman stood in a corner with Hughes, the silver-haired man remaining impassive as Hughes laughed.

Roy noticed the tears in the small blonde's eyes and pulled him to his feet, embracing him tightly.

"It's alright, Ed," Roy murmured soothingly. He stroked the boy hair in an effort to calm him.

"They're gone, Roy," Ed choked, holding back a sob. He felt an overwhelming sense of loss suddenly come crashing down on him. He wouldn't cry, that much he knew. When he was injured, that was the first time he had cried since he and Al had lost their mom. And even that… It hadn't been so much out of fear or pain, though he was undeniably hurt and afraid, but more because he realized that his squad was gone.

"They wouldn't want you hurt, Ed, you know that," Roy said softly.

He felt Ed pull away from him and he knew the comment had worked as intended. Ed had done the same thing when Hughes had died, and Falman two months after that. That was a year and a half before the war. God, that seemed like an eternity ago. The dark-haired man allowed his smaller companion to touch each of the stones before he withdrew the cranes from his pocket. After setting them down and telling Ed to stay back, something which earned him a rather strange look, he took out his spark-cloth gloves. He snapped once, sending out four streaks of flame. Immediately the cranes began to burn. Ed could smell the flames.

"What did you do?" he asked, angry at the thought of Roy starting a fire at the gravesites.

"Those letters we wrote," the dark-eyed alchemist said calmly. "I'm burning them."

Ed was silent. When he thought about it, it kind of made sense. He waited a moment until the fires went out before stepping in front of the closest tombstone. Carefully he felt to see where the papers had been and clapped his hands. Roy watched in amazement as white flowers like nothing he'd ever seen sprung up between Ed's hands. He continued to watch in silence as Ed knelt before each stone in turn, leaving the same white flowers where the ashes had been.

"Roy," the boy said softly, turning back to the older man. "Let's go home."


	12. Chapter 9

**A/N: **Hola! I haven't posted in a while, cause I haven't been able to get online. Long story... Anway, section 9. Finally, no more 8whatever. Sorry about that. The italics are a dream sequence. This doesn't really have all that much to do with the plot thus far; it's kind of filler, kind of not. Real definitive there. I just thought I'd explore the darker corners of my mind and answer a question asked by AkitaFallow back in section 7: What happened to Ed that he's so apprehensive?

Thank you to my reviewers, KobrahEdo and Spirix.

Disclaimer: It's been awhile since I've said this, so I thought I'd remind you. I do not own FMA.

* * *

Roy lay awake listening to the soft sound of the rain against the window. Beside him Ed tossed and turned, whimpering in his sleep. What worried the dark-haired man was that this was happening more and more often. It wasn't as though he hadn't tried to help. He knew the boy was suffering with these recurring nightmares; waking up trembling and exhausted, often to the sound of his own screams. But each time Roy tried to ask about them Ed became distant, often for a day or more. So he had stopped asking.

"Envy," Ed pled softly in his sleep. He sounded frightened. "Just leave me alone."

Roy turned to watch the sleeping blonde, trying to make out what he was saying.

_It was cold and dim in the room. The only light came from a lamp on the table. The room really looked like a jail cell, which, for all intensive purposes, it was. Ed scanned the room for possible escape routes, but found none. The only way out was the door, and Envy was guarding that. He had already tried transmuting the walls, but there was some kind of spell on the place that prevented him from doing so._

_A sound at the door made Ed jump. Slowly it creaked open and an all too familiar face appeared._

"_Hello, chibi," Envy purred from the doorway. "How's the Full Metal Shrimp today? I brought you some food. I do take such good care of you, don't I. You should thank me. Although I suppose it is mostly because Lust wants you alive. I see her point; we can't complete our little project without you. Though if it were up to me you'd be dead by now and we'd just use your precious little brother instead. But Lust wants it to be you. Says you're more powerful, or something like that. Still, it seems a waste to just throw away something so pretty."_

_By this time Envy had set the tray he was carrying on the table with the lamp and made his way over to Ed. The alchemist tried to press himself further into the cold stone wall, but he couldn't escape Envy's touch._

"_Envy," Ed said shakily. He knew he was in no condition to fight. "Just leave me alone."_

"_I don't think so," Envy purred, savouring the boy's fear with a sick satisfaction._

_His mind skipped ahead to a night nearly three weeks after that first encounter. He heard the door open and cringed at the thought of what was coming. In the silence of the room he heard Envy's voice._

"_Hello chibi," the homunculus purred._

_Ed didn't give him the satisfaction of an answer; he didn't even open his eyes. This, however, only served to anger the green-haired monster. Ed could feel the homunculus's cold, hungry, violet eyes on him._

"_Open your eyes," the green-haired homunculus hissed, pinning the small blonde to the wall. "Look at me."_

"_No," the alchemist growled._

"_Open your eyes, Edward," Envy roared._

_Ed jerked in the homunculus's tight grip. That was the first time Envy had called him by his name. This unexpected twist in the hellish routine startled Ed so much that he didn't hear the door open. He had no idea anyone else was in the room until another chilling voice reached his ears._

"_That's quite enough, Envy," Lust said coldly._

_This time Ed did open his eyes. In the doorway stood a tall, thin woman with the same empty violet eyes as his attacker. She took in the whole scene with a kind of calculated satisfaction in her distant smile that made Ed shudder. It only lasted a moment, though, because before he could blink needle-like claws shot from the woman's outstretched fingers, impaling both Envy and Ed._

"_I know what you've been doing, Envy," Lust whispered. "Don't forget, you belong to me." _

_She twisted the claws a little, causing Envy to cringe and Ed to whimper softly._

"_And you, Fullmetal," she said sharply. "This is your fault."_

_She retracted the deadly claws, allowing the two to collapse to the floor. In a heartbeat Envy was up, readying himself for a fight. Lust, however, had other ideas. The claws shot out again, catching Envy and flipping him over her shoulder and out the door with no effort at all. She would deal with him later._

_With Envy out of the way she rounded on Ed. Again the claws came out. Ed dodged all but one. Lust smiled. Ed shivered at that smile. He was going to die._

"_So that's how you want to play," Lust smirked. "Alright."_

_She walked the claws across his chest, stabbing and withdrawing, until they were spread shoulder to shoulder. Finally she had him pinned firmly to the wall, all four claws driven through his body into the stone. He watched, unable to move, as she with drew a claw from his left shoulder. Horrified he watched the blade-like finger hover above his shoulder. Then the claw curved downward, cutting through his shoulder into the bone. Ed screamed, as satisfaction filled Lust's eyes._

Ed woke with a scream and immediately felt a pair of arms close around him.

"NO!" he shouted, shoving Roy away.

Roy frowned, watching the small blonde trembling, eyes shut tight. He put a hand on the boy's shoulder only to have it slapped away.

"Ed," Roy said softly. "It's just me. It's Roy. Calm down."

Slowly Ed opened his eyes and felt around for Roy's hand. The dark-eyed man moved his hand closer so that Ed could find it. Once found the hand was pressed to the blonde's cheek, Ed's way of confirming it was really Roy. This time he allowed Roy to embrace him, burying his face in the older man's chest.

"I'm sorry Roy," Ed said quietly.

"It's ok," Roy said as he stroked the boy's blonde hair. With one hand he traced small circles on Ed's back. The boy felt thinner than usual. Roy made a mental note to do something to remedy that. "Anything I can do?"

Ed simply shook his head.

"Alright," the dark-haired man said. "You're alright now."

It was going to be a long night.

* * *

**A/N:** Well, there you have it. You can probably figure out what happened. I don't write lemons 'cause I'm not that brave. Thanks for reading!


	13. Chapter 10

**A/N:** Hola! Looky, I didn't drop off the face of the earth! Yay! Sorry for not updating in nearly a month. Grr... college starts soon and everyone's leaving. This sucks! Anyway, about this section. Have you ever had one of _those_ days? I was having one of those days when I wrote this, and I think it shows a little.

Thank you to AkitaFallow, Krows Scared, Ling Yao, Spirix, Lunadia, and VadMustang for reviewing. And Spirix, thank you soooo much for a suggestion you made forever ago. That's going to be a huge help when I write the ending, which should be soon. This will probably only be a couple more sections.

* * *

The next few months passed uneventfully. Things at headquarters had regained some semblance of normality. A new staff had been put together and placed under Roy's command, but it just wasn't the same. They didn't have the same distinct personality as the old squad. Hell, Roy was even put off by the fact that his new lieutenant didn't threaten to shoot him for not finishing his paperwork.

To Ed these new-comers were an unwelcome hassle. He learned quickly to identify them by voice, but that was just it - they were nothing but faceless voices. He didn't allow any of them to come near him, let alone touch him. He had never minded a friendly pat on the back or a hand on his shoulder from the old squad, but these people were different. Roy had once had to stop him from stabbing the new lieutenant with a transmuted automail arm after she made the mistake of tapping him on the shoulder to get his attention. They had all stayed away from him after that.

Mostly Ed spent his time learning to read brail. He picked it up fairly quickly and it gave him something to do since he was no longer of any real use to the military. He spent the days planted on the couch in Roy's office, reading. Roy would watch him, sometimes for hours, just wondering what he was thinking. That was one thing that really worried him. Ed had gotten so quiet sometimes it was hard to know he was even there. He had lost weight, too. Quite a bit of weight, actually. He had always been thin, but nothing like that. Roy had had to take in all of the boy's clothes, although he hadn't said anything to the blonde about it. Ed was so light now that Roy could carry him without any difficulty, something he had done on several occasions when Ed had been too tired after work to make it up the stairs to go to bed. That was another thing that bothered him, Ed had gotten so weak that sometimes it seemed like he had trouble with the weight of his automail limbs. Roy tried his best to get him to eat more, but with little success. As it was, the small alchemist barely ate at all. As the days had progressed he had begun to speak less and less as well until their new squad whispered to each other that they thought he was a mute and even Roy had started to wonder. It felt like the boy was slowly fading away.

The small blonde never meant to be cold toward his lover, but at times it was all he could do to keep from completely closing himself off from the world. It was just too much. He supposed he should be adjusting better to the way things were now, but he wasn't and that was all there was to it. He didn't know why, he just couldn't seem to get past everything that had happened. And to make it worse there was the guilt. He was worrying Roy. Even an idiot would realize that, and Ed liked to think that he was a bit more observant than most people he knew. Every day it was the same things: Roy worrying about the nightmares and fussing over him being dizzy in the morning, then trying to force him to eat breakfast even though the last thing Ed wanted to do was eat, then there was the dreaded silence of the day at the office, then the walk home and being told to eat more at dinner, then back to bed and the horrific dreams that would wake them both in the middle of the night. It wasn't that he didn't appreciate it, he had just ceased to care. To be honest he didn't even care anymore if he lived or died. The only reason he even made it through the day was that he kept himself too busy to think. Whenever his thoughts strayed, even for a moment, it became difficult to breathe, like someone was simultaneously crushing his chest and filling his ribcage with cement. It was moments like that that made him wonder, and it was those moments when he began to wonder that really scared him. And he knew he could never confide in Roy about what he was feeling. He already felt guilty about troubling the dark-eyed alchemist; he didn't want to make it worse. And so he stopped talking, leaving Roy to wonder just what was going on in his mind.

Ed sighed to himself as he sat in Roy's office reading a book. He hadn't really been paying attention for the past three pages. His thoughts had strayed to his dreams. There were more of them now, different ones about not only Envy, but the war and some of the things he had seen on his missions. But mostly they focused on either Envy or the war. Every night he was forced to relive the battles that had taken his friends and, more often, the battle that had taken his limbs. As a result he hadn't been sleeping very much.

Roy, meanwhile, was reading through a report about an escaped criminal. When he saw the name, he froze. Scar, the notorious state alchemist killer. It was bad enough that they'd let a criminal escape, but a serial killer slated for execution? The dark-haired man looked up at the small blonde on the couch. This would put them both in danger. He debated for a moment whether or not to tell Ed what had happened, but after looking at the clock he decided to walk him home first. Quickly and quietly he gathered up his things and ushered Ed out of the room. The golden-eyed boy followed calmly, book in hand, but Roy could feel himself beginning to worry. He couldn't help felling that something terrible was going to happen.

* * *

**A/N:** Yay, cliffhanger! Don't worry, I won't take so long posting this time. 


	14. Chapter 11

**A/N:** Hola! Sorry about the cliffy. And I'm gonna go ahead and appoligize for this one because 1.) it's rediculously short. 2.) it's really, really broken up, but I changed view points and wanted to make that clear so I'm sorry if it's distracting and 3.) it's another cliffhanger. I hope you like it anyway.

Thank you to VadMustang, Fluffy's fangirls, Dark Chocolate Alchemist, and ed'sgirl10310 for reviewing. And to VadMustang, I hope your surgery went well and that it was nothing major. Hope you have a quick and complete recovery.

* * *

_Roy_

Quickly Roy unlocked the door and allowed Ed to precede him into the house. The small blonde did not need any guidance here. Roy followed him to the living room and joined him on the couch. It had been his intention to finish up some of his paperwork before helping the blonde cook dinner and he figured he may as well get started. Sighing he opened his briefcase only to find that in his haste he had grabbed the wrong file. The file he needed was still in his desk draw back at headquarters.

Glancing up at the clock he saw that it was only a half past six, forty-five minutes before Ed usually started on dinner. That gave him more than enough time to go back and switch the files. He would tell Ed about the break out when he got back so that the small blonde wouldn't worry.

"Ed," Roy started. He had gathered his papers and shoes and made his way to the door. "I just need to run back to the office and get some papers."

After all, he would be there and back in fifteen minutes. What could happen?

_Ed_

Ed heard the door close and rose to follow. He would have to be careful, he hadn't navigated the city without Roy guiding him since he was blinded. But what could go wrong? He could always pick out Roy's footsteps without any difficulty.

_Roy_

Step, step, step, look left, look right, step, step, step, what was that? Why couldn't he have just left it be like he usually would? Why did he have to be motivated? And why now of all times? This was a terrible idea.

Roy sighed heavily. Five minutes and he would be at the office. Two more and he would have his papers. Then seven more minutes and he would be home again. He glanced around again and thought he saw someone move in the shadows. Shaking his head he dismissed it and continued on.

_Ed_

This was a terrible idea. Utterly stupid. Ed wondered just what he had been thinking when he had decided to follow Roy. He had lost the dark-eyed man almost as soon as he had left the house. Now he was lost. He had the feeling he was wondering in circles and worse than that was the creeping suspicion that someone was following him.

_Roy_

At last Roy had his papers and was headed home. Quickly. Scar had been spotted in the in the area and he didn't want to spent a moment more away from Ed than he absolutely had to. Not to mention he still had that feeling of dread. Suddenly he saw something that brought him back from his thoughts.

* * *

**A/N:** Yeah, cliffy. The next chapter will probably be the last. Almost there!


	15. Chapter 12

**A/N:** Ok, so you know how I said this was going to be the last chapter? I was wrong. Anyway, thank you all so much for being patient with me while my computer died a slow and painful death. I'm really sorry about leaving you with a cliff-hanger and then not updating for two weeks, but there wasn't much I could do. Again, thank you for being patient.

Thank you to Dark Chocolate Alchemist, Skeleton Tree, Krows Scared, FMA lover912, mylifehaslostdirection, angel-of-nothing, ed'sgirl10310, and lost cause for reviewing.

**Disclaimer:** I do not own FMA.

* * *

"Edward!" Roy yelled. The small blonde whirled around transmuting his arm and slashing at everything within reach. 

"Roy?" he called, stopping as he hit something and struck out at it again. He was still trying to judge where Roy's voice had come from, though he was certain it wasn't Roy he had hit.

Then sudden Roy was at his side. He wasn't sure how he knew, but the man was there. Ed supposed it was because of the time he had spent sparing with Roy and Al back in Resembool to get used to using his automail. Either way, Roy was there fighting at his side and it was a great comfort, even if he didn't know the identity of his attacker.

"Don't let him touch you," Roy hissed.

The big man with the grey hair and the x-shaped scar over his eyes reached out for Roy, who dodged and threw a fireball. Beside him Ed muttered something obscene under his breath as the stone… thing he had just transmuted missed his opponent.

"Ed! Run," Roy ordered.

"And leave you here?" Ed replied as he felt a streak of flame shoot past his left ear, singeing his hair.

"GO!" Roy ordered.

Another hand thrust at his face.

"NO!" Ed shot back, defying him yet again.

Dodging another ill-placed fireball, Ed managed to land a blow on the large man, who tried to grab his coat.

"Fullmetal, as you're commanding officer, I order you to run," Roy snapped.

Another shot, another miss. That one only blistered his arm.

"As your lover I'm telling you I refuse to abandon you," Ed said angrily.

"Fools," came another voice. "Your deaths are God's divine will."

And then it clicked. Scar. In the split second Ed was distracted a large hand landed on his metal arm. Shit. That was bad. Before he knew what had happened, his automail was gone.

"Ed, do you trust me?" Roy said, finally sounding scared.

Ed turned his blind eyes toward the source of his lover's voice, frantic now that he couldn't use alchemy.

"Of course I do, Roy," he said shakily.

"Then run," Roy said as he tried to fend Scar off. "Get as far away from here as you can. If possible, go to HQ. If not, I don't care where you go as long as it's away from here."

"Roy," Ed said, feeling himself beginning to shake. "I love you."

"Run! Now! Get out of here!" Roy shouted. He knew he was fighting a losing battle. He knew he didn't have much time and he **had** to know Ed was safe. If he was going to die, he wanted to die knowing Ed would be alright. He turned his attention away from the fight just long enough to see Ed turn to follow his final order. He felt his heart break as he realized the one thing he hadn't told the boy. In vain he whispered it to the small blonde's retreating back. "I love you."

Ed thought he heard something as he sprinted down the street. He had no idea where he was going, his mind clouded by fear. Roy was back there fighting Scar and there was nothing he could do about it. Absolutely nothing. He was useless. Worse than useless. Roy… might die. All because Ed was too slow to dodge and now he couldn't fight, so Roy was alone and in danger. And Roy was only in danger because Ed had been stupid enough to leave the house after Roy had told him not to.

Suddenly he was standing on the front steps of headquarters. Even though his mind had had no idea what was going on, his feet had apparently known where to go. He got over his surprise quickly and dashed inside.

"Help!" he shouted through the halls. "Somebody! Anybody! Help!"

"Edward?" The voice belonged to one of the few people he knew who had survived the war. Of course that was because she had never fought. "Edward, what's wrong?" Sciezka asked worriedly.

"Roy," Ed panted. "He's fighting Scar. He's alone. It's all my fault. Hurry. Scar's going to kill him!"

"I'm going to get help," Sciezka said calmly. "Stay here."

And with that she was gone. Ed felt his knees trying to give out beneath him, but he refused to let them. He couldn't give up yet. Roy still needed him. There still might be something he could do to save the man he loved. He felt a single tear slip down his cheek and bit his lip to keep any more from following. He could already hear the footsteps of Sciezka and whoever she had brought with her.

What happened next was nothing but a blur to Ed. He was ushered back out of headquarters and asked to lead the squad to Roy. He got there fairly quickly, only taking two wrong turns. But none of that mattered. None of it mattered because of what happened next.

Ed ran full out until he reached the place he had left Roy, only stopping when his foot hit something. Frantic, he dropped to his knees to see what it was. He froze as his hand came to rest on the familiar fabric of a military uniform. Roy.

There was a pool of blood forming under his head, staining Ed's uniform an ugly red as he tried in vain to get a response from the dark-haired man.

"Roy? Roy!" Ed's voice cracked as he shouted, ignoring the sounds of the startled soldiers behind him. Most of them were new and had never seen Scar's work. Quite frankly, Ed didn't care what they had or had not seen. He pressed a hand to Roy's neck and rested his head on his chest. The still silence confirmed his worst fear. Roy was gone.

* * *

**A/N:** Just a note about Sciezka's name. I actually looked it up on the FMA website (cause I'm a dork) and that was how they spelled it. I see how you can get Jessica out of that if you squint, but it's still probably the wierdest spelling I've ever seen. 


	16. Chapter 13

**A/N:** Hola! Welcome to the chapter you've all been waiting for! This is finally the last chapter. I appologize for my tardiness, but I'm terrible at writing endings. To all of you who are angry at me for Roy's demise, I don't know what to tell you. I got ten very angry reviews about how mean I am for killing off Roy. I knew from the start I was going that Roy would die, so I don't know what to say besides that's how the plot goes. Perhaps you'll forgive me after this chapter. There is a slight alteration from the original ending I had planned, thank you much to the the reviewers (all 7 of you) who inspired the change. And I must say, this has been a bear to write, but I'm sad that it's over.

Thank you to Xylia Luna Orion, flower miko, VadMustang, Angibugg, Lunadia-aloneforevermore, Tsukasuru, essence of light, Everbloom-Karisa, September's Nobara, Dark Chocolate Alchemist, Katsushiro Okamoto, AkitaFallow, msberry, KobrahEdo, Spirix, FMA lover912, ShimigamixGirl, MARYLOVER, ShadowDragonMistress, catwomen47, CuteLittleEarthbender, ed'sgirl10310, Krows Scared, Fluffy's fangirls, Skeleton Tree, mylifehaslostdirection, angel-of-nothing, lost cause, EdElricRules, and shadow alchemist 401 for reviewing.

Thank you to 7LetterDirt, Aeriel Cross, AkitaFallow, Angibugg, BLood Zephyr, CuteLittleEarthbender, DarkInuHanyou, FMA lover912, Fluffz's fangirls, Katsushiro Okamoto, KobrahEdo, Lunadia-aloneforeveremore, wateria88, Xylia Luna Orion, ed'sgirl10310, flower miko, haganennocutie94, mylifehaslostdirection, shadow alchemist 401, tsuki-okami-hime Tsukasa, and walkthrough for favouriting my story.

Thank you to AkitaFallow, Danya2, Dark Chocolate Alchemist, DarkInuHanyou, EdElricRules, FMA lover912, Fluffy's fangirls, FullMetal Neko, Katsushiro Okamoto, Kobrah Edo, Krows Scared, Lunadia-aloneforevermore, Lurkinshdws, MARYLOVER, September's Nobara, Shadow Stalker7, ShinigamixGirl, SilenceNights, Skeleton Tree, Spirix, SupernaturalFreak1, Taicico, TayloWolf, Ultimate-Phantom-Inuyasha, VadMustang, wateria88, Xylia Luna Orion, angel-of-nothing, animegirl0610, cuylerjade, essence of light, gaijin-san, inuyashbooklover5188, mikomialchemist, mylifehaslostdirection, and silver candle for adding this to their story alerts.

And a big thank you to my imouto silentwatcherXXX for letting me be completely annoying and bounce ideas off of her all the time.

**Disclaimer:** One more time: I do not own Fullmetal Alchemist.

* * *

Ed didn't cry at the funeral. He just stood silently at the side of the coffin as though unaware of what was happening. As the only remaining member of Roy's squad he had to endure everyone's condolences. When it was finally over, Sciezka walked him home. She waited until they was far from everyone else to speak what was on her mind. 

"I'm sorry Ed," she said softly to the small blonde next to her.

Until then they had walked in silence, Ed reaching out every so often to touch her sleeve. As she watched him she thought of his immediate reaction to Roy's death. In that moment he had seemed so young, so innocent and naïve. Now he seemed old beyond his years and it made her wonder exactly what had happened to him in his short life time. She knew about the failed attempt to bring back his mother – the mistake that had nearly cost him his brother's life – joining the military when he was only twelve, and the war that had cost him his limbs and his sight. His first brush with death had come when he was only ten, only a child. He was little more than a child now. He was barely twenty and already he had lost so much.

"I know you've already heard that a million times today," she continued, "but I don't think they understood just what he was to you."

Ed turned his blind eyes on her and even though she knew he couldn't see her, his gaze was still piercing. She felt as though he was searching her soul.

"I know you loved him," she persisted. "And I know he loved you. It hurts, doesn't it? To lose someone you hold so dear. You're so young, younger than me, but you've been through things I could never even imagine.

"He was the only person who truly understood you, wasn't he? Aside from your brother. I can't even imagine what it must be like for you, how much pain you're going through. I only wish there was something I could do."

Ed stopped walking. He simply stood staring after her until she noticed he was no longer with her. His sightless golden eyes were unnaturally bright.

"Ed?" she said, confused.

She reached out to place a hand on his shoulder and suddenly found herself pulled into a tight embrace. Tentatively she hugged the boy back as he buried his face in her shoulder. By the dampness that was invading the fabric of her shirt, he was crying. Sciezka didn't know what to say, so she kept quiet. It wasn't until he let go of her that Ed spoke.

"You've already helped," he told her. "You were the only person there today who didn't try to tell me they knew what I was going through, how I felt. The only one who could have even come close to knowing was Gracia."

"Do you want to talk about it?" Sciezka offered.

Ed shook his head. "Not now. Right now all I want to do is sleep. Would it be alright if I stayed at your place tonight? I don't think I can handle going home right now."

"Of course," Sciezka said.

Ed ended up spending two nights at Sciezka's and two more with Gracia and Elyshia before going back to Resembool. On the day he was to leave, Sciezka helped him pack up his things from his and Roy's house and get them to the train station. Elyshia cried when she was told her uncle Eddie was leaving, but he had consoled her by telling her it was only for a little while and that if she was patient, then he would come back. Sciezka and Gracia and Elyshia were all with him at the train station as he departed Central for what they thought would be the last time. The legendary Full Metal Alchemist had finally reached the end of his run.

As he sat alone on the train, he reflected on what had happened earlier that morning. Gracia had taken him to visit Roy's grave. She had left him on his own while she went to visit her husband. It was then that he had told Roy the thing he had kept a secret for nearly a month before his passing. He had written a note the night before and as soon as Mrs. Hughes was out of sight he had placed it on the grave and burned it. Then he had used the ashes and transmuted the same kind of flower as he had for his fallen comrades, only this one was bright red. Red for fire, red for passion, but most importantly, red for love.

But it was the note that changed everything. He remembered exactly what he wrote. He had told Roy how much he loved him and how much it hurt that he hadn't gotten to say that once more before he was gone, he told Roy what his plans were for the time being, and he revealed the secret he had been keeping from everyone. His eyesight was beginning to return.

It wasn't much, just a slight brightening of the darkness that he had begun to notice over the past couple of months, but it was a start. He had hesitated to tell Roy for fear that nothing would really change and he would have had the man excited over nothing. But it was there, and he could literally see the difference. He could see a difference when he opened and closed his eyes and when he walked from a bright room into a dimmer one. It wasn't much, but now that that frail hope was all he had, it was everything.

Al, Winry, and Aunt Pinako were waiting when Ed arrived at the station in Resembool and he was welcomed home with open arms. They had heard about what had happened. Sciezka had spoken to Al the night Roy died. And it was Al who now came to his brother's defence, insisting that Winry and Pinako leave him alone until he was ready to talk.

After supper that evening Ed disappeared. Winry panicked, but Pinako insisted it would be alright, that Ed knew the area well and he just needed some time to himself. In the end Winry only calmed down after Al agreed to go look for his brother. It didn't take long to find him. He was sitting alone on the bank of the river where the two of them had played as children. Al watched as his brother sat perfectly still, his head resting on his knees as he hugged them to his chest, blind eyes focused on the setting sun. Al knew why he was there. First off, this was where they had always come as children when they were upset or when something bad had happened, and something bad had happened leaving Ed quite upset. Then there was the sunset. Roy had told him about the last night he and Ed had spent out together before the war. They had gone to a quiet place just outside of Central to watch the sunset. Al still didn't know why Roy had told him that, but he was glad now that he had.

"Brother?" Al said softly, hesitant to break the silence.

Ed didn't answer, merely turned to face him, gesturing for Al to come and sit.

"I'm sorry about what happened, brother," Al said. He leaned over so that he could rest his head on his brother's human shoulder. He had always done that when his brother was upset. For some reason it seemed to help.

"I miss him, Al. More than as a father or my Colonel," Ed said. Normally he would never have said anything to hint at his relationship with Roy, but something told him it was alright.

"I know," Al said. He was glad Ed trusted him enough to say that. "He told me when you were here after the war."

Ed froze and looked down at his baby brother. He took a deep breath to calm his nerves. Of course Al knew. Al always knew everything.

"It's ok," Al continued, feeling more than seeing his brother tense up. "He said you were afraid to tell me. I don't hate you brother. I couldn't. And I really do feel bad about what happened. He meant a lot to you."

"Hey Al?" Ed said, deciding he didn't want to have this conversation at the moment. "If I tell you something, can you keep it a secret? I don't want anyone else to know just yet."

"Of course, brother," Al replied, curious.

"I never told Roy this and now I wish I had." Ed paused. "I'm starting to get my vision back."

"Ed that's wonderful!" Al exclaimed, hugging the older blonde tight.

"It's not much, but it's there," Ed replied, not sounding nearly as excited as Al.

"What's wrong?" the younger Elric asked.

Ed sighed heavily and turned his gaze back to the horizon. "I just wish I could see the sunset."

Al nodded and held his brother tighter. It would take a long time and a lot of help, but he knew Ed could heal. One day his brother would be whole again. Silently Al pledged to help in any way he could.

As the blood-red sun sank below the western edge of the earth the two brothers sat silently watching until the darkness began to creep across the sky from the east.

* * *

**A/N:** Yeah! Finally! Woohoo! And FMA lover912, I liked your request. Yes, there will be a sequel. I'm not sure when it'll get written, so be patient with me, but it will happen. If anyone has any suggestions pertaining to the sequel, let me know. It will be titled Phoenix. That's all she wrote! 


	17. Author's Note: Sequel

Hola,  
As requested, the sequel is up. It's titled "Phoenix." That's all.  
Jya ne,  
Lily


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